2 Ocak 2012 Pazartesi

S13E03 Margaritaville


Park Season13 Episode03</font>
Do I really have to do this,dad?
Stan,now more than ever you need to
understand the importance of saving money.
But grandma said I could use
this money to buy whatever I want.
Okay,next,please.
Go on,stanley.
How can I help you,young man?
I got $100 check from my grandma.
And my dad said I need to put it in
the bank so it can grow over the years.
Well,that's fantastic. A
really smart decision,young man.
We can put that check in
a money market mutual fund,
Then we'll reinvest the earnings
into foreign currency accounts
with come can pounding
interest and it's gone!
Uhh,what?
It's gone. It's all gone.
What's all gone?
The money in your account. It
didn't do too well. It's gone.
What do you mean? I have $100.
Not anymore,you don't. Poof!
Well,what can I do
to get back my --
i'm sorry,sir,but this line
is for bank members only.
I just opened an account!
Do you have any money
invested with this bank?
No,you just lost it all.
Then please stand aside for people
who actually have money with us.
Next,please.
Hello,mrs. Farnickle. How are you today?
Making a deposit,are we?
Great. We can just put that into your retirement
at and make it go to work for you and it's gone.
What?
Sorry,yeah. That's gone.
Please step aside for people who actually
have money with the bank. Next,please.
Dad!
Hey,i'm trying to teach my son
about the importance of savings.
You already lost his money?
Oh,mr.marsh! Don't worry.
We can just transfer money from your account and
into a portfolio with your son's -- and it's gone!
This line is for people who
have money with the bank only.
Please step aside.
This is the 9 news special report.
Recession! A nation in peril.
An economic cris has hit south park
and the nation like never before.
Another south park bank has closed
down,leaving thousands of people in debt.
It's just crazy,you know?
Everyone's affected by it.
It's like all the money just vanished.
It's really terrifying. We've got
no money to pay our mortgage now.
We could very easily lose our house.
Hi,grandma.
First,the money started going and
now everyone's getting laid off work.
They took our jobs!
Just how far will the economy fall?
We asked economic reporter
dan banks for his assessment.
We'll have the rest of dan's
interview tonight at 10:00.
All right,everyone,eat up.
Oh,jesus christ.
Sliced hot dogs and tomato slices?
You said we had to be
careful with our money.
I've got nothing for a food budget!
Mom,dad,how come there's
suddenly no money?
I'll tell you what happened,son.
See,there's a bunch of idiot s out there
who weren't happy with what they had.
They wanted a bigger house and materialistic
things that they didn't even need.
People with no money who got loans to buy
frivolous things they had no business buying.
And these assholes just blindly
started buying any stupid thing
That looked appealing because
they thought money was endless.
It goes back to when the government had the idea
that everyone in america deserves to own a house.
So we have people having a hard time paying
their loans meaning less money coming in.
And the idiots couldn't see that by doing all this
frivolous spending they were mocking the economy.
And they made the economy very angry.
We're all feeling the economy's vengeance
because of materialistic heathens
who did stupid things with their money.
Do you understand,son?
Yeah. I think I get it.
And so why is our economy failing us?
Because the government kept
interest rates too low for too long!
The government took our economy for granted
and now we are all here paying the price!
How long will we sit and
watch our economy fall --
And so I say to you,do not listen
to the wall street brokers for they
are the ones who put
us in this situation!
Fat cats with corporate greed.
- They are the ones who knowingly drove us down this pathway of doom.
- and so where has all the money gone?
It must have gone somewhere.
The answer is obvious,my
friends. It is the jews!
Covetous jews,who have taken all our
money and hoarded it for themselves.
Hidden all the cash in some secret jew cave
that they built,probably back in the early '60s.
And now we hear all different people casting all
different kinds of blame from person to person.
But the fault lies in all of you. You!
Who bought that $300,000 house when
you only had $20,000 to put down. You!
Who bought that third car even though
only two people in your home drive.
It is time to stop pointing fingers.
Finger-pointing gets us nowhere. Steve!
We have mocked our economy and now the
economy has cast its vengeance upon us all.
He's right. This is the first
guy to actually make sense.
Yeah,it is an angry
and unforgiving economy.
To repent we must stop
frivolous spending.
Instead of paying for
cable,let us watch clouds!
Instead of buying clothes,bear
but sheets from thine beds!
Cut spending to only the bare
essentials -- water and bread.
And margaritas,yeah!
Hello,young man. Welcome to
sur la table. Can I help you?
Yeah. I wanna return this
margaritaville my stupid dad bought.
Oh,that's all we get anymore,returns.
Could you please put the
receipt here on this table?
Sorry,our computers are slow today.
We need a new ethernet cable.
Oh,i'm sorry,sir. I'd like to give you a
refund,but i'm afraid that's not doable.
- What?
- I said i'm not able,sir.
You see,this margaritaville was
purchased with a payment plan.
So?
Well,an outside financing company
handles those payment plans.
Customers just pay for some of the machine
and the finance company pays for the rest.
Well,can't I just return it and
get the money my dad put in back?
Hmm,that's improbable,but
not impossible.
I'm not really sure how it works.
You'll have to speak with
the people at the top.
I can give you the finance company's
address if that's agreeable with you.
We have become lovers of pleasure,rather
than lovers of the economy.
There are those who will say
that the economy has forsaken us.
Nay you hath forsaken the economy!
And now you know the economy's wrath.
Oh,thoust can shop in
a sporting goods store,
But knowest thou that the economy will
take away thy broncos cap from thy head.
You mocked the economy without fear.
Thine own stockbrokers,now
lie dead by their own hand.
And thou knowest that thy
stockbroker did not fear the economy.
Well,here we are,my friends.
You have brought the economy's
vengeance upon yourselves.
What can we do,randy?
Yes! Tell us! What do we
do? Tell us what to do!
We must all wear sheets instead of
buying clothes that need detergent.
Instead of cars that take gasoline,we
can get around on lamas from drake's farm.
Instead of video games that take batteries
and software,our kids can play with squirrels!
We must let the economy know that
we are capable of respecting it.
No more needless spending!
The economy is our shepherd.
We shall not want!
Morning,ted.
Morning,al.
Well,this sucks.
Sure was better when our
parents were buying us stuff.
Of all the times for people to
decide to stop buying things,
It has to be the week the grand theft
auto 4 comes out for nintendo ds!
You want something
new every week,fat ass.
Don't you fraternize me!
This is all your fault,you know.
My fault?
The jews took all the
money away and they --
don't even start! Don't
even start,cartman!
Well,why are we wearing bed sheets
and playing with squirrels,kyle?
Not because of the
jews,butters! Who told you that?
Well,eric did!
Just tell us where the cave is,kyle.
Now look!
The reason we're in this situation
is because people are being stupid!
The economy isn't some vengeable
being that takes things away from us.
The economy is just made up by people.
And people have just
lost their faith in it.
What people really should
be doing is spending more.
Spending is fine!
We best speak with the council.
Tell them a young jew is speaking
heresy towards the economy.
can I help you?
I want to return this margaritaville.
Okay. Let me send you into josh.
Hey,welcome to big
orange finance company!
Yeah,have a seat. You want some carmex?
No thanks.
I want to return this margaritaville and the guy at sur
la table said that you are the company that financed it.
Ooh,yeah. No. You know what? No,yeah.
What?
Yeah,we can't give you your
money back for that. Yeah,no.
You'd have to talk to the
people on wall street. Yeah.
Wall street?
Yeah,no,see what I do is find americans who want
a frozen beverage machine but can't afford one.
And I hook them up with investors who want to get
into the margaritaville payment plan business,yeah.
So?
Yeah,so the problem is your margaritaville
payment plan has been combined
With thousands of others into
one big margaritaville security.
Yeah,no. Yeah. No,yeah.
The entire town has given
over to your ways,mr. Chairman.
Everyone has even stopped using electricity
so as to stop paying electrical bills.
You've really done an
amazing thing,mr. Marsh.
People have learned to hold on to their money so as
to not feel the sting of the economy's mighty sword.
I am pretty smart,yeah.
But I have assembled this economic committee
to make sure everyone sticks to my new plan.
We've got guards posted at the malls to make
sure nobody gets tempted to buy dumb stuff.
And pat saltzman is doing house checks to make
sure nobody's ordering anything stupid online.
Then perhaps soon our
economy will return to us.
Council,i bring news of discord!
A young jew was in the town square
speaking blasphemy about the economy.
What?
He was saying that your ideas are
false and the economy is not vengeful!
He was rallying people to spend more!
Spend more? What mockery is this?
Relax,father maxi.
What harm can one jew do against
our economic recovery movement?
I had a dream last night.
I was in a field,and I had grand theft
auto chinatown wars right next to me.
But then the sky went black and grand theft
auto chinatown wars just melted in my hands.
What's that?
Excuse me. We need to
borrow your squirrels!
- What?
- No! No,please!
You have sinned!
Oh,jesus,i'm sorry. Please!
What's going on?
Garrison,you have brought your
filth to this town for the last time!
What did he do?
Your teacher was caught buying a kitchen
aid stand mixer at bed,bath and beyond.
Take thy punishment,heathen!
Hey,stop it! Stop!
Move aside,kid. He must
pay for his stand mixer.
C'mon,this is ridiculous!
What's ridiculous about hucking squirrels
at a man who has angered the economy?
Just have a little compassion,huh?
I mean,everyone's gone out and bought
something stupid. It's not so bad.
Whichever of you guys has never
bought anything frivolous,go ahead
And huck the next squirrel
excuse me? Excuse me!
I'd like to return this har mark,please.
Margaritaville?
My dad bought it on a payment plan
that was set up by a finance company
Which got their principal
investors from somebody here.
Oh,that makes sense.
It does?
You see,son,we lumped thousands of these
margaritaville installment plans together
into margaritaville based securities,
Then chopped those securities up in a
way that we could sell them to banks.
So I can return it to the bank?
Nope. Because a bunch of people like you
are defaulting on their margaritavilles
So the government had to buy the
margaritaville assets from the banks.
What?
Just talk to the treasury
department. In d.c.
They're the ones who really
understand how all this works.
Oh,sell,sell,sell,sell!
Listen,this is all you need to know.
The economy is not a
supernatural all-knowing entity.
The economy is just an idea made
up by people thousands of years ago.
The economy is not
real and yet it is real.
Nowadays,they'll give credit cards to
practically anyone who applies for them.
I applied for this
yesterday to prove a point.
It is an american express platinum card.
It has no spending limb.
Do not be afraid!
This is only plastic.
It's just something made up by people.
Truly meaningless until
we put our faith in it.
Faith is what makes
an economy economist.
Without faith,it is only
plastic cards and paper money.
By all report,the young
jew is not letting up.
He is still going around convincing people
to have faith in the economy by shopping.
We've done everything we can and
yet the economy has not improved.
Worse,it has declined.
Poor bart here just lost his
job at little caesar's pizza.
Our tireless work is obviously
being undermined by this one jew.
Why does he go around pretending to
know the true will of the economy?
Perhaps he is the economy's
only son,sent to save us.
Are you retarded,stotch!
The economy is omnipotent.
Which means it can do anything.
So saying it would be
limiting to one son is stupid!
That is stupid,yeah.
And going around telling
people to shop is dangerous.
Well,then there's only one option.
We have to kill the jew.
Yep,i think we gotta kill the jew.
I don't know. He's got a lot of support.
It might be hard to even catch this jew.
Did somebody say "catch a jew"?
The person you are after might be
hard to get,but I can bring him to you.
And all I want in return
is chinatown wars for
a handheld nintendo sd
uh,how can we help you,young man?
I want to return this margaritaville.
My dad bought it on a payment
plan set up by a finance company
That got investors from wall street
who combined it into securities,sold
to banks who transferred it to you.
Ohhh,that makes sense.
No problem. We just need
to consult the chart.
We can determine your property's
value and we'll be done.
Really? Thank you.
Be right back
excellent news,sir.
We've determined the investment value of
your margaritaville to be $90 trillion!
What?
Hey,what's the matter,kyle?
You seem bummed out.
I just have a feeling this might
be the last time we get to do this.
Don't worry,kyle. We're not
gonna let people kill you.
We'll keep you hidden forever!
I can't just hide my whole life,butters.
And besides,i have this strange feel hag
one of you is gonna totally betray me.
All right,whoever is thinking of
betraying kyle,that is not cool.
That's frickin' lame,dude.
Kyle's trying to get
the economy going again.
If somebody is thinking of stabbing
him in the back,you're being a dick.
Go ahead,kyle.
Whoever it might happen to be,i'm
not giving him the opportunity.
Tomorrow,i'm going to
have to do something.
Something i've known I would have
to do to restore people's faith.
Kyle,please. For sake,don't
do anything drastic.
There's no choice anymore,guys.
Don't worry about me.
I've been preparing for
this for a while now.
No,no,no. Excuse me. I don't understand.
How can this stupid thing
be worth $90 trillion?
What,you think it's worth more?
No! Dude,that doesn't make sense.
Well,you don't get $90 trillion,but
the chart says that's what it's worth.
Oh,oh,problem! Problem again!
What is it now?
Another insurance company
is about to go under.
If they do,people could lose millions.
Okay. No problem. We
better consult the chart.
Sir,another insurance
company is going under.
Now determining most prudent
move for insurance company!
Bailout!
Most prudent move is a bailout!
Bailout the insurance company!
It's a miracle.
Why would someone do this?
What is this? What is going on?
There. Look.
It's the jew.
Somehow he got a platinum
amex with no spending limit.
What's he doing?
He's paying for everyone's debts.
Hey,thanks,kid. This
is really nice of you.
But that's impossible.
Why would he do this?
So that people have money to spend.
Kyle! Kyle,you have to stop this!
It's okay,ma.
No,kyle,you'll be in debt
for the rest of your life.
Please,somebody,get him to stop!
Uh,there's about $17,000 worth here
he paid for our debts so
we could spend once more.
He's dead.
No,he's just passed out.
We should get him to bed.
For the first time in almost a year,the economy in
south park has take an small,but noticeable upturn.
Stores and shopping malls are open again as newly
debt-free people feel safe to make purchases.
The new margaritaville!
With salsa dispenser!
Just pour your favorite salsa in the top
and it comes out the dispenser at the bottom!
Oh,we need this!
Are we out of the woods yet?
Only time will tell.
But we must not forget the sacrifice
one person made to restore our faith
And make us believe in
the economy once again.
The person we must thank every
day for his amazing sacrifice --
barack obama.
Ah.come on.

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