? I'm going down
to south park?
? Gonna have
myself a time?
? Friendly faces
everywhere?
? Humble folks
without temptation?
? Going down
to south park?
? Gonna leave my
woes behind?
? Ample parking
day or night?
? People spouting
"howdy neighbor"?
? Headin' on up
to south park?
? Gonna see
if i can't unwind?
? So come on down
to south park?
? And meet some
friends of mine?
Hey, you guys,
look what i have!
What?
Four tickets to
"the lion king" on stage.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh, come on, you guys,
it's supposed to be really cool.
Yeah, no,
it sounds really cool.
You guys, you guys,
oh my god!
Oh my god,
you guys!
What, dough boy?
I was just-
I was just watching the tv,
they had this commercial.
So?
They're gonna say
Tonight on that show
"cop drama".
What?
Guess.Me on,
They're gonna say something
that's never been said on tv.
What?!
You'll never guess.
What?!
Guess.
God damn it, cartman, what are
they gonna say on cop drama?
You ready?
Tonight on cop drama, on tv,
they're gonna say...
"Shit."
They're gonna
say shit on tv?
They can't say
shit on tv.
It was just on the news!
People are
freakin' out, dude!
Holy shit.
We gotta watch.
Yeah, i'm gonna have people
over my house to see it.
But i've got these tickets
to see lion king on stage.
Maybe you didn't
hear me, kyle,
I said "shit"
on television.
It's just a marketing ploy
by the network.
Like that time they had the first
male-To-Male kiss with terrance and phillip.
Oh, come on dude,
this is history.
It's stupid.
Jeez, you're a little
irritable, kyle.
What's the matter, you got
some sand in your vagina?
No, i don't have
sand in my vagina,
I just think it's a little immature
for us to be standing around,
Talking about one dumb word
being on tv!
Hey, ah, sam, did you
hear the news?
Yeah, they're gonna
say "shit" on tv.
We should all get together
and watch it at the bar.
Yeah!
Yeah.
Yeah.
Are you guys gonna
let your kids watch?
Oh, sure.
I mean, y'know, cop drama's
a very artsy, dramatic show.
And they're gonna
say "shit"!
Hey, butters, i got tickets
to go see lion king tonight,
And i decided to invite you
before anybody else.
Oh, sorry, i can't.
They're gonna say "shit"
on cop drama,
And my mom and dad say
i have to watch it with them
So that i don't take it
the wrong way.
How many ways are
there to take it?
It's just a stupid word!
Hey, everybody,
it's on in 30 minutes!
Listen, mitchell, i put my life
on the line every day.
How dare you accuseme!
Oh, i bet this is it,
here it comes.
I'm doing my job, frank.
We have to know where that
evidence was shipped.
Oh, was that it?
Was that it?
Shipped,
he said "shipped."
We don't have a record
of that, and besides,
Your job is to protect the men
who serve this force.
God damn it, when are
they gonna say "shit"?!
Shh!
Maybe... maybe
protect them from you.
Maybe you're forgetting
who you're talking to.
And maybe you're forgetting
i used to be a cop, too!
Yeah, you used to be
a lot of things!
Oh, he doesn't know mitchell
slept with his wife, does he?
That's it,
i've had enough of this.
Don't you turn your
back on me, you.
I said enough!
Is it?
Will it ever be enough?
Cop drama will return
after these messages.
Jesus christ,
another commercial!
Are they ever
gonna say "shit"?
I'm sure they're just holding
it to the very last scene.
Uh! Uh!
Where you going, kyle?
I'm going to the kitchen,
this is stupid!
But you're gonna miss it.
They're gonna say "shit"
and you're gonna miss it.
I don't really
give a.
Oh.
Just understand
that it's my job.
I still think
you're a good cop.
Well, mitchell, i guess
you're going to do
What you're gonna do.
Let's just try and stay
friends no matter what.
You're right, maybe
i'll see you around.
Goodbye.
Oh, and mitchell-
You've got some shit on the
side of your mouth right there.
Oh, yeah,
thanks, thanks.
Wow!
Whoa!
Whoa!
Whoa!
They did it.
I can't believe
they actually said it.
Dude, you missed it, kyle,
it was so awesome!
Well, i hope it lived up
to all the hype.
You must feel
somuch better now.
Kyle, we've gotta get that
sand out of your vagina,
It's making you cranky,
does it itch?
Do you really think anything's
gonna be any different now?
Do you really think
that this will have
The tiniest, smallest
effect on the world?
It's still the same old
world out there, look!
What the hell?
Whoa, dude,
it's raining frogs.
Oh, whatever.
Last night the daring
and bold show "cop drama"
Broke new ground by
saying "shit!" On television,
Making shit officially okay
to say around the country.
A recent poll shows
that 24% of americans
Think the show has pushed
the envelope too far,
While a whopping 76%
Say they don't really
give a shit.
In other news,
a strange virus
Which causes victims to
vomit up their intestines
Is making life shitty
for a small farming community.
Rick watts
has the story.
Thanks, tom, shit is
certainly going down
Here in the small town-
Rah rah rarlb!
Whoa, shit!
All right, children,
in lieu of the common usage
I'm supposed to clarify
the school's position
On the word "shit".
Wow, we can say "shit"
in school now?
Oh, this is
ridiculous.
Just because they say it
on tv, it's all right?
Yes, but only in the figurative
noun form or the adjective form.
Heh?
You can only use it
in the non-Literal sense.
For instance:
"That's a shitty
picture of me."
Is now fine.
However, the literal
noun form of
"This is a picture of shit,"
is still naughty.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
The adjective form is now
also acceptable.
"The weather
outside is shitty."
However, the literal adjective
is not appropriate.
For example:
"My bad diarrhea made the inside
of the toilet bowl shitty,
"And i had to clean it
with a rag
Which then also
became shitty."
That's right out.
S... s...
Shit!
Very good, timmy.
Ah, ms. Choksondik.
Can we say it
in the expletive?
Like, "oh shit!"
Or "shit on a shingle"?
Yes, that's now fine.
Wow, this is
gonna be great-
A whole new word.
It's not new!
I'm gonna look "shit" up in
the encyclopedia and prove it.
Don't mind kyle, everyone,
He's just got a little
sand in his vagina.
There's no sand
in my vagina!
Boys, watch your
language, shit!
And so children, instead of
saying, "hand in your papers."
I may now say,
"hand in your shit."
Any questions?
What about, "i have to
take a shit"?
No, no, filmore!
You can say, "i have to
poop and shit."
Or "oh shit,
i have to poop."
But not
"i have to shit."
Are we all clear?
No! No!
Look, it's all
about context.
For example, recently
i have come out
And admitted that
i was a homosexual- I'm gay.
That means that now i can say
the word- "Fag".
On tv, they usually
don't allow- "Fag".
But because i'm gay
it's all right.
And with the new approval
of the word "shit",
That means that
finally i am free to say...
? Hey there
shitty shitty fag fag?
? Shitty shitty fag fag
how do ya do?
? Hey there
shitty shitty fag fag?
? Shitty shitty fag fag
how do you do?
Oh, this is great.
Well, that store
has such lovely shit.
Yeah, too bad i don't have
shit for cash right now.
Ohh, looks like the weather
might turn shitty.
Oh, i don't really
give a shit.
I've done enough shit
outside today and shit.
Shit, peter,
you look like shit.
No shit, i feel like shit.
I think i-
Blargg blargg!
Holy shit!
Did you see
that shit?!
What kind of
shit is this?
That is some
weird shit.
Susan, your shit's ready!
You know where
this shit goes?
Shit if i know.
Nice going,
shit for brains.
? Old macdonald
took a shit?
? E-I-E-I-O?
Dumb shit!
? Hey there
shitty shitty fag fag?
? Shitty shitty fag fag
how do ya do?
? Hey there-?
Oh shit, excuse me.
Hey, watch it, fag!
What did you call me?
I called you a fag.
Because i'm gay, and that means
i'm free to use the word "fag"!
So piss off,
you fag shitter.
Ha, ha, ha!
? Hey there
shitty shitty fag fag?
? Shitty shitty fag fag
ba doop a doop doo?
This sucks.
Now that shit's out, it
isn't fun to say it anymore.
Yeah, they've taken all
the fun out of "shit".
We're gonna have to start
saying other bad words,
Like "cock" and
and meecrob.
What's "meecrob"?
That stuff you get as an
appetizer at thal food restaurants.
Meecrob is way grosser
than shit, dude.
I'd scarf down a whole
wet bucket full of shit
Before i ate another
plate of meecrob.
You guys, you guys!
I looked up
the word "shit".
I think it might have something
to do with people dying.
What?
Haven't you noticed
everyone getting sick?
It all started when they
said "shit" on television.
Oh kyle, you are
so full of meecrob.
I am not full
of meecro- What?
Look, the word "shit" first
showed up in english in the 1340s,
The same time as something
called "the black death".
What's that?
Kyle, do you still have
sand in your vagina
About us not going to
lion king with you?
I mean, shit, dude,
let it go.
Look, it might be
coincidence,
But i think
we better ask someone.
Come on!
A 75 share- My god, i never
thought it was possible.
Sir, your "shit" idea has
turned the entire network around.
We're proud to work for you.
Sir, i'd just like to
take this opportunity-
And i'm sure i speak
for all of us-
When i say, you are the most
creative genius in hollywood.
And well, i'd let you
have me if you wanted.
Thanks, roger, but i've
only just started.
You see, i've
already figured out
Our new marketing
scheme-Technique
For the next
run of shows.
Whoa!
He's unstoppable.
What's the new idea?
I can hardly wait.
I'm about to
piss myself.
This saturday, onhbc,
we're going to say...
"Shit"...
Twice.
Twice!
Brilliant.
Think of the
repetition.
It's like saying it
once, but double.
Well, gentlemen,
let's get on it.
Ho!
Ho!
? Baby
you are so fine?
? And shit?
? The shit you do
the shit you say?
? I'll jump on
your shit any day?
Oh, hello there,
children.
Hey, chef.
Chef, do you know where
shit comes from?
Uh, from your ass,
children.
No, no, no-
The word "shit".
Ohh...
Detective sandy vagina here
thinks that "shit"
Might have something to do
with everyone getting sick.
It said in my book
that the word "shit"
Started the
exact same time
As something called
"the black death".
The black death?
Are you sure?
What's the
black death, chef?
Latoya jackson,
children.
Ohh!
But i think back in those days
it meant something else-
The plague.
It says here the word "shit" has
been around for over 600 years.
It comes from the anglo-Saxon
word "scite".
Right, but in the 1340s,
People in england
stopped calling it "scite"
And started
calling it "shit"-
The same year as
the black plague.
This is the oldest book
in the library-
A priceless original of
england's history.
Just about everything you could
want to know about the plague
Is in this great tome.
Oh, shit.
Well, this other book has
some good information too.
The black plague-
Over half of europe
was killed by it.
Look, they're puking out
their intestines
Just like the people here.
Look at this, children,
It says the people in england
believed the plague was a curse.
"A dark magic infliction
Brought on by a mass utterance
of a word of curse."
Word of curse?
A... curse word.
Of course!
I've never even thought about why
we use the term "curse word" before.
Because it brings a curse,
like the black death.
You guys, look here.
In this
"nancy drew" mystery
Nancy goes to the beach and
gets sand trapped in her shoe.
This could explain how
kyle got it in his vagina.
Cartman,
this is serious!
So am i, kyle.
If that sand in your vagina
doesn't get released
You could become
a walking time bomb.
Heh, heh, heh.
If you don't mind
i'll have to close up now.
They're going to say "shit"
seven times on hbc and-
Blargg,
blarg-Blarg-Blarg!
Holy shit!
Oh-Ho, gross!
Dude, this plague is
spreading like wildfire.
Uh-Oh.
Uh-Oh.
Kenny's got it,
heh, heh.
We gotta
do something, chef.
If we don't stop
that network
"Shit" will become an even
more acceptable word.
Children, we've got to warn
those producers in hollywood
That the plague and "shit",
could be linked.
Hello, ladies and gentlemen,
this is your captain speaking.
If you look out the right side
of the aircraft
You can see some
interesting shit.
And over on the left side
There's some
interesting shit too.
We should be arriving in
los angeles in about two hours.
Until then, we invite you
to sit back, relax
And enjoy our
shitty service.
God damn it, kenny, don't
get your plague germs on me!
Cartman, stop
being an asshole!
The ratings are in, sir.
We broke another
record last night
With the show that
said "shit" seven times.
Where is the roof
on this thing?
I mean, how can we
top ourselves now?
Gentlemen, i have it.
The end-All, greatest marketing
ploy of all time.
Tonight, on hbc, we will air
all our sitcoms live
And have everyone say "shit"
in place of their written lines.
And we'll call it
"must shit tv".
Bravo!
Night of a
million shits!
Now, doing this live
will be difficult, so we-
Hold on a minute,
mr. Producer.
Who are you?
My name is chef, and
these are the children.
We've come to
warn you about "shit".
Oh brother, another
christian protest group.
Who wants to
take this one?
I'll get it.
Gentlemen, we appreciate
your concern.
Here at hbc,
the general goal is
Providing the highest, most
thought-Provoking entertainment.
How great is it that we live in a country
where an artist can express himself freely.
That's not only the american
spirit, it's the hbc spirit.
Which allows us to make great family
programming, like "halo the turtle".
And of course, everyone's
favorite show, "cop drama".
We can't thank you enough for
bringing your concerns to our network.
For it is you, the loyal hbc
viewer, who makes this great network.
And indeed, the great
country that it is.
All right now,
as i was saying-
Hey, hold on a minute!
Are they still here?
Haven't you people noticed all
the strange things going on?
We think that
you might have caused it
By helping make "shit"
an everyday word.
Right, right.
It's true.
We think that word might be
plaguing our friend kenny.
Do you have any
proof of this?
No.
Then get out of here before
we have you thrown out.
But we can keep the
"halo the turtle" dolls, right?
Damn cracker-Ass
producers!
Now, what are we
gonna do, chef?
I don't know,
children.
I guess we got to get the word
out to people some other way.
Aaahh!
Oh shit!
Aaahh!
Stand aside!
All right, now we have to get all
our biggest names to say "shit".
And then
we're gonna-
Halt your evil plans!
Huh?
I possess the
"rune stone of undoing".
Who is in charge here?
Oh, no!
You guys didn't hire me
a stripper for my birthday.
Oh, tell me
you guys didn't.
Show your true form, geldan,
lest you be afraid.
Your short time
in this world is at an end.
Ach! The rune stone
has no effect.
You are not geldan.
I never said i was.
You'll die anyway!
For you have spread
the word of curse.
Security!
Aach!
Who are you?
Take this.
What are we supposed
to do with it?
Ehhhgggh.
Now what?
We've got to find people who know
what the hell this is all about.
Children, we're gonna
have to go to the land
Of castles, knights
and kings.
Lords and ladies,
we bid you welcome
To the grandest casino
in the land-
Excalibur!
Take a free spin,
double your odds.
Excuse me,
do you work here?
How can i help you,
noble sir?
We need some help identifying
an ancient english stone.
A what?
It might hold the key
to a curse.
Uh, i can help get you some
credit or a comp meal perhaps.
Dude, we need help
from the british.
Look, kid,
this is just a casino.
I can't help you.
You know, not every
british person
Knows about wizards
and dragons and curses.
We just need help
identifying this.
A rune stone of gaelic!
Where did you get this?
You know what it is?
The skire once spoke
of such a stone.
Come, we must
see the sorcerer.
Get ready for
must shit tv!
Starting now, four straight
hours of pure shit!
It's all live!
Hey... shit.
Hey, shit.
Yeah, yeah shit.
This is it,
my greatest work.
Cocktails,
cocktails.
These americans
wish to see the skire.
Let us make haste
to the inner sanctum.
How could you foolish americans
bring the wrath of scorn
By mass chanting the word
of wretchedness?
Uh, yeah,
we didn't mean to.
Didn't you realize "shit"
is a curse word?
Well, yeah, but i don't think we
knew that "curse word" meant...
Curse word.
Ha, leave it to americans to
think that no means yes,
Pissed means angry
And curse word
means something
Other than a word
that's cursed!
Let me see the stone.
But i don't get it,
People use curse words
all the time.
Saying a word of curse once
in a while does nothing.
It's only when spoken
repeatedly and en masse
That the curse
takes place.
I've seen this before.
Stones that were used by the
knights of standards and practices.
Knights of standards
and practices?
A legion of men sworn to do
whatever necessary
To keep the words at bay.
But, they were
just a myth.
You know what?
You're dumb as shit.
Oh yeah?
Well, i don't really
give a shit.
You know, that word's
getting kind of old.
It's not really
funny anymore.
Yeah, they're gonna
have to come up with
A new swear word soon.
Well, they
can't use fag,
Because you can't say fag
unless you're a homosexual.
Really?
So we can't
say?
No, see,
you got beeped.
You mean you have to be a
to say?
That's right.
Well, that's not fair.
I should be able
to say fag.
Hey, you didn't
get beeped.
Uh-Oh.
Well, well, well,
guess we learned
Something new about you,
jimbo, you friggin' fag.
You wanna make out
or something?
Oh, man,
i am up shit creek.
Serves you right,
shit for brains.
Man, how could i be
such a dumb sh-
Say not the word
of curse!
Ugh!
What the-?
Holy shit!
Oh boy, this show is really
reaching for plot now.
The knights were formed to keep
curse words to a minimum.
Should a curse word ever be
let out, they would return.
A rune stone for each
word of curse was made,
Representing each of the eight
words that so offended god.
Look, there's
the "f" word.
And asshole.
I knew it-
Meecrob!
Meecrobis
a curse word!
God must hate it
as much as i do.
Look at this.
The writing here
claims this stone
Can defeat the evil geldan
who will arise
When the word of curse has been
said enough times to give him power.
Then all the world
will be destroyed.
All the world
destroyed?
My house too?
Oh, no!
What?
Tonight is the night of
a million shits on hbc!
It's gonna be said
over and over.
Then we haven't
much time.
We must go.
Turn off those devices
of broadcast!
What is going on here?
Stop this shit.
We are the royal order of
standards and practices!
We command you to stop
saying the curse word.
Listen,
mr. Shiny pants,
I am the head
of this network,
And i will say "shit"
all i want.
Shit, shit.
Shit, shit, shit.
Shit shit shit shit shit shit
shit shit shit shit shit.
Shit shit shit shit shit
shit shit shit shit.
Shit shit shit shit
shit shit shit shit!
Oh!
Oh my god!
Run, run!
Oh, shit.
And now back to
must shit tv,
Here on hbc.
He is too strong!
We cannot fight him
without the rune stone!
My, my god, sir,
What have you unleashed
upon the world?
I didn't know.
I didn't know!
I, i can't follow this
shitty storyline at all.
Wait!
Oh boy, that thing has really
got sand in its vagina.
The rune stone!
Face it towards geldan.
Ah, dude, lame.
Lame, bummer, dude.
What a stupid voice.
It's okay, the curse
has been lifted.
Yeah, we all gotta make sure
it doesn't come back.
You see, we've learned
something today.
Swearing can be fun,
but doing it all the time
Causes a lot of problems.
We're all saying
the "s" word too much.
Hey.
Look, gerald, kyle's on tv. Uh-Huh.
The knights of standards
and practices were created
To make sure that bad words
were kept to a minimum.
Curse words-
They're called that
because theyarecursed.
We have to go back to
only using curse words
In rare, extreme
circumstances.
Besides, so much use
of a dirty word
Takes away from
its impact.
We believe in free speech
and all that,
But leaving
a few words taboo
Just adds to the fun
of english.
So please, everyone,
From now on, you've got to try
and watch your language.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It makes sense.
Got that right.
Is this still
part of the show?
We're sorry, noble knights
of standards and practices.
From now on,
we will obey your laws.
See that you do.
I'm very proud
of you children.
Let's all go home and find a
nice white woman to make love to.
Yeah, and
kenny didn't die.
Yeah, i didn't-
Holy sh- Poop.
Ha, i love you guys.
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